Every day my travels as a trekking notary lead me to tales and adventures. Today would prove to be so true!

My Welcoming Committee

Arriving at 72 Rosemont Drive in Wilton, Ct.- I was welcomed by five large roosters. All are walking around as if they were in charge of the property without caring. As I was saying hello to all my red-necked friends, I was cautious not to step on their contributions. The contributions I am referring to are brown! Therefore my steps were measured foot by foot. Initially, I made it through this natural field of landmines.

As the roosters followed me, I lost my concentration and stepped in a large mass of “residue.” Yuck — welcome to the farm, wiping my sneaker in the dirt and the grass. It seemed forever. Success, I was only left with a brown stain.

Are We Getting Past the Yuck-I thought?

Finally making it to the front door, I could not find a bell. I, therefore, began knocking on the yellow-painted wooden door. Knock knock, one after the other, with no answer. Finally, with the roosters barking out, I turned to get my phone out of my bag. A giant rooster began nibbling at my left leg as I called the borrower. I shook and shook my leg without any success! Somewhat frazzled, I immediately took my backpack into my hands for further protection if needed.

Where are the Birds

With my contorted body, I saw two people standing in the driveway. The male was yelling out in a loud Slavic accent, “we do not use the front door as we have a bird’s nest sitting on the roof above.” Initially, I was taken aback by the vibrating solid voice and command. WHERE WAS THIS BOOMING VOICE when I needed my rescue from the nibbling roosters? Once again, I heard, “do not knock on the door-you will disturb the birds’. I immediately answered, “how would I know not to use the door-I do not live here.” Without another word, the borrower and his wife started walking into the garage to enter the home. I knew this would be an entertaining and different morning with no pleasantries passing and the hungry roosters.

How Did I End Up On the Farm?

Upon entering the kitchen, my eyes were popping out of their sockets. Through the sliding glass doors was a giant pigpen. Once I started refocusing, 300-pound beasts thrashing around in the mud came into view. The menagerie of animals was continuing oink by oink. A sizeable barbed wire enclosure circled the giant mud pit. I counted four pigs snorting and roaming. Honestly, I could not believe my eyes. I was sitting in a kitchen with the aromas of a country farm. Within seconds two large brown labrador retrievers came running and jumping into the room. I am a dog lover but not a lover of screaming dogs at any closing. I just wanted to get to the freedom of my car and safety. Fortunately, Valcheck-the borrower, led the dogs out the sliding glass doors to the backyard farm without anyone saying a sound.

Now back to the matter at hand-the closing. The borrower, the wife, and the witness are all talking t in their native tongues.

Do Animals Have Better Manners?

I took the papers out of my bag, stating, “ Let’s get going.” The borrower did not utter a word to me as he kept shouting at all the animals. Finally, the borrower asked for a pen. I explained I did not supply pens since covid. Valcheck, in a very discerning voice, stated, “why am I so rude concerning the pen?” Responding, “I’ve been in thousands of closings since covid, and I have never supplied anyone a pen’.

In this Mexican stand-off, the only sounds were; roosters announcing the morning, dogs barking, and pigs snorting.

Finally, after an eternity, Valcheck got up, retrieving a pen. In halting English, the wife told me, “my husband is in a bad mood’. I said to myself-” really.” I kept biting my tongue and working double hard to keep my cool.

With the closing finally beginning, I began explaining the documents. Suddenly, the borrower kept asking questions that were irrelevant and inconsequential. The borrower was trying to show off and challenge me at every turn. I stated, “I do not know what you are asking about,” repeatedly. Once again, in a very arrogant voice, the borrower said,” I thought you were an expert and had done 1,000’s of closings”. I answered, I am not an expert, and maybe this will be my last one”. The silence in the small room only was reverberating with the animal sounds outside. I continued holding my ground; the signing continued at last.

We Are Almost at Home Plate

Now it was time for the witness to sign. The wife kept directing the older woman in their very Slavic language. Finally, after a few minutes of discussion and direction, the party began to sign. It took minutes, which seemed like hours, for Marina Elenova Basak Tumolovnora to print her name one letter at a time. The signature was a few letters.

I Am Outta Here!

I was finally completing this adventure. Without uttering a word, I made a beeline for the exit. I was surviving the farm and the closing. Once outside, the roosters, who greeted me upon arrival, saluted me with their strongest crowing. All as was bidding farewell to the farm. These red neck creatures showed me more respect than the humans-I and kept my cool!

The Journey from World Trekking to Notary Trekking and the Life Lessons Learned. Reinvention, Discovery, and Keeping It Real.